Das Plumber

13 04 2008

I was going to write a post about yesterday’s quartet sessions, but life got the better of me, like it always does, and so now this:

I accidentally locked myself out of the house this morning (does anyone do this on purpose?) as I left for church. It being early, I decided against waking (and earning the ire) of my housemates, shrugged it off, and went about my day.

8 hours later, I return to an empty boarding house; no housemates to holler at, no keys to get in through the door. Not wanting to waste what was left of an otherwise lovely afternoon, I did what any able-bodied young man in the same situation would do: break in!

Well, not really. Suffice it to say it involved climbing in through an open window…and that the window was on the second floor. Let’s not get into detail regarding how I got to the second floor in the first place.

Everything was going swimmingly (hint, hint) until I heard a dull “crack!” and a jet of water hit me squarely in the face. In my preoccupation with trying not to step through the roof, I had stepped-on (and obviously broken) one of our waterlines.

You know that feeling when you’ve done something bad and your first reaction is to try and cover it up? I think I was up there for about a minute or so holding the pieces of pipe together with my bare hands (a vain attempt really), furiously thinking, “Whatdoidowhatdoidowhatdoido…”, all while getting drenched.

Well, the pipes emptied themselves after a bit, leaving me there, dripping most pitifully, wondering what on earth had just happened and what, for the life of me, could I do about it. I realize now that the solution involves about 2 feet of pipe, suitably threaded at both ends, teflon tape, and monkey wrenches. It may also require the cover of darkness since I don’t want the neighbors looking-up and wondering, “What is that idiot doing up there?”

I remember that as a kid, I wanted to be a plumber (thanks to Super Mario) – but not that badly!

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